Friday, 1 January 2010

Results of Poll on: What Drives Loshon Hara?

In our last poll, we inquired:

What do you think drives Loshon Hara?

In your opinion, what is the one, most salient reason that allows for a proliferation of loshon Hara and/or rechilut?

A) the underlying low quotient of Ahavat Yisroel or Ahavta lerei'acha kamocha within our communities;

B) the underlying lack of "giving the benefit of the doubt"
[betzedeq tishpot amitecha; dan et kol ho'odom lekaf z'chut]

C) the general lack of gravity or seriousness attached to harmful speech

D) the desire to feel good about oneself at the expense of another [saei'ach bikolon chaveira - schdenfreude]

E) ego and surety that one is correct in saying these things


Your Responses (Total 16):

Option A - 00% (0)
Option B - 19% (3)
Option C - 25% (4)
Option D - 19% (3)
Option E - 37% (6)


Comments

Rabbi Hecht:
While no one chose Option A, which places the main cause on a lack of Ahavat Yisroel, aspects of this weakness is also indicated in the choice of Option D and to some extent Option B. In an overall sense, though, the poll seems to indicate that the real issue revolves around how we view evaluating and judging another, i.e. the very process of personal decision making. This problem finds itself expressed in variant ways as indicated by the distinctions in the various options.
Option C would seem to indicate that people would seem to believe that there is fundamentally not even something wrong in the very process of judging others. A review of the laws of Loshon Hara would clearly challenge such a viewpoint.
Option E would seem to indicate that the major problem is that people believe that as long as the process is honest, it is okay. Again, the laws of Loshon Hara would challenge such a perspective as the prohibition applies even when the said statements are true. In addition, there seems to be a prevalent problem in that people are so sure that they are right and, of course, that their decision making processes function properly. The further problem with this is that, with such a belief, a person could even mistakenly justify their loshon hara through faulty halachic reasoning that their ego tells them is absolutely correct.
Option B, in addition to its indication of a problem in Ahavat Yisroel, clearly shows the weakness of many in their own decision making processes. Dan lekof zchut is as much a virtue of the intellect, demonstrating the ability to see multiple possibilities, as it is an aspect of the virtue of caring.
What I see from the poll, is that people perceive the problem of Loshon Hara as not a weakness in our feelings towards others but a weakness in how we see ourselves and our functioning as decision making, and as such cognitive, individuals.

Rabbi Wolpoe:
Even if Lashon Hara was not a problem at all - I would still recommend reading RIM haKohen's sefer "Sh'mirat Halashon" as a course in "Ahavat Yisrael" - along with the Tanna d'vei Eliyahu. B'Tzedek Tishpot Amitecha is another factor weighing in to our judgmentalism.
Until being dan l'kaf z'chut becomes a way of life, there will never be peace on our world. Without a doubt in my mind, this is the single greatest cause of hostility and a leading cause for mis-interpreting facts and jumping to faulty conclusions.

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